Contingency Plans
by Iorek Byrnison
Summary: Six months into his recovery of literally being stabbed in the back by a Norse God, Tony walked into his apartment and demanded that he move into the Avengers Tower. This set off a chain of events that Agent Phil Coulson wanted to say he never expected. Unfortunately, he couldn't. S.H.I.E.L.D. had a contingency plan for dating Tony Stark. Tony/Phil/Steve MegaSLASH, explicit themes


**Contingency Plans**

_iorekbyrnison_

_****An epic tale told in a not so epic way****_

Six months into his recovery of literally being stabbed in the back by a Norse God, Tony Stark walked into his apartment and demanded that he move into the newly renovated Avengers Tower. This set off a chain of events that Agent Phil Coulson wanted to say he never expected. Unfortunately he couldn't. S.H.I.E.L.D. had a contingency plan for dating a genius playboy billionaire philanthropist. And when Captain America got thrown into the mix, well, S.H.I.E.L.D. had a contingency plan for that too.

* * *

It started simple enough. Three months after the New York "incident" as the world had started calling it, Tony Stark waltzed himself into Agent Coulson's hospital room all bravado and in an Armani suit stating that he was collecting Avengers in his eyesore of a tower and needed his head cat herder on call. Phil merely stared at the billionaire for a moment and, because he was drugged, hurting still, and upset that Supernanny wasn't on, fell back on old, but effective threats.

"_Go away or I'll get up from this bed and I swear to all that is Holy I will taser you Stark."_

Stark seemed to consider his options for a moment and wisely turned tail out of the hospital room.

Agent Coulson thought that would be the end of It, because he had no desire to be an over glorified superhero babysitter (except in his heart of hearts he kind of did), but three months later, when Stark bypasses all the security procedures and protocols surrounding his modest home in New Hampshire he finds out he was wrong. Tony Stark, without his suit, sits by a man who could probably still kill him in more ways than he knows to die. They watch the episodes of Supernanny that Phil missed while in the hospital and generally try to ignore each other's presence.

It doesn't work.

When Tony Stark asks him to move in again he does it just as rudely, smirk placed on his lips. But Phil Coulson wasn't Nicholas Fury's right hand man for nothing. He notices the way Stark's eyes are tight in the corners, the way his hands sort of tremble before he shoves them in his pocket. It's that nervousness and vulnerability that makes Phil consider the offer as something real and possible.

Two months later he moves into Avengers Tower with little fanfare. His floor is only one below Tony's and they never mention the incident again.

* * *

The start of their physical relationship goes something like this: Surprise attack from Loki, Mission, Stark doing something that almost gets him killed, Coulson threatening to tase him into unconsciousness, and sex. Lots and lots of sex.

It's like a mild explosion in his head the day Tony Stark shoves him against the wall and then pushes his tongue down Phil's throat. He attempts to protest, if only for the principle, but Stark reaches a hand down his pants and grasps a half hard erection and all Phil can think is "fuck it" before returning the favor. That first time, they don't go all the way, but they get pretty damn close and afterwards Phil lays sort of curled around the billionaire on Tony's massively comfortable couch and can't seem to find it in him to regret anything.

He's been Tony's handler for years at that point. Nobody save maybe Pepper Potts knows the man better. He's aware of all of Tony's faults, but he's more aware of the things the man tries to hide, the good things like an overzealous sense of generosity, or a fine eye for details even if he pretends to forget them, or the fact that he's been Iron Man at heart for much longer than he's been the Merchant of Death. Phil Coulson sees all of those things and can't find it in him to regret.

Of course, the next day Tony backs off, finds excuses on why it would never work, tells Phil that he'll ruin any relationship before it even starts. Phil merely stares at his new lover with a raised eyebrow and then pulls the man into a deep kiss. He makes sure to keep it hot, needy, and physical in such a way that a pressure surely develops in Tony's abdomen. If his hands wander quite a bit, if Tony sort of whimpers in protest, well, those things aren't mentioned.

"_Don't make me tase you Stark."_

* * *

Tony still doesn't call him anything but Agent, at least, not in public anyway. For a long time nobody knows anything about whatever relationship they might have. Their trysts are kept private, exciting, away from the view of others.

"_Phil." _

Tony says his names like a prayer. Phil finds delight in the fact that nobody hears it the way Tony says it. He also finds delight in bending the dark haired man over every available flat surface in the billionaire's penthouse. There's even one memorable occurrence that includes a questionable uses of the Iron Man suit, but it only happens occasionally and nobody needs to know about that save them. Phil finds creative ways to make Tony keen his name over and over, shouting, whimpering, gasping, and moaning. It becomes one of his favorite pastimes.

Eventually though people start to find out. It's mostly by choice, except for one.

Pepper finds out, because Tony can't keep a secret from her if he tried. The red headed woman smirks at Phil the next time he sees her and he instantly knows the metaphorical cat is out of the metaphorical bag. But Pepper is Pepper and so she doesn't tell.

"_I'm happy for you both_" she says standing between the two in front of the large windows of Tony penthouse, gazing thoughtfully at the view. Later she pulls him aside out of Tony's earshot and tells him exactly what she'll do to him if he hurts Tony in any way. For all of Coulson experience with life or death situations, he can't help but shiver from the steal in her eyes and the way her hands twitch as if they want to wrap themselves around his throat.

Happy finds out by accident, maybe. And it might have included a quickie tryst in the back of one of Tony's limos, some loud bouncy moans, and very obscene sucking sounds that leave the driver unable to look Phil in the eyes for _months_. Tony says he thought the limo was sound proof, because, "_Why the hell would I have a limo that isn't sound proof Phil?" _But Phil has his doubts, mostly because Tony goes around smirking for a week after that and even Phil knows that, aside from James Rhodes, nobody has known Tony for longer than Happy Hogan. The billionaire has placed his life in his bodyguard's hands more than once and if that doesn't speak volumes about Tony Stark's relationship with Happy then Phil doesn't think anything else can explain it. As it was, not long after he is approached by Happy and repeats the threats Pepper spoke to him not long before. Phil should be offended that so many people think it's _him_ that will screw up, but he can't help but be happy that his lover finally has people in his corner that care about his well-being.

When Rhodey finds out the soldier punches him in the jaw. It's unwarranted, Phil doesn't understand it, but when Tony rushes to get him an ice pack and holds it tenderly against his jaw then begins screaming at Rhodey who's standing there watching him with critical eyes he thinks he might.

"_What the fuck Rhodey?"_ Tony says with a tight voice.

But Rhodey only nods and shakes Phil's hand. There are no verbal threats, because Rhodey's been a soldier and Phil's been a spy long enough to know that the threats are already implied.

Phil tells Nicholas Fury as a matter of business. He does still have to answer to superiors and he doesn't mention that after Clint Barton and Natasha Romanova, Fury is the closest thing he has to a friend. So Phil stands at attention in Fury's office and politely tells his friend that he's fucking Iron Man (Tony's words not his). The spymaster just stares at Phil with one eye over steepled fingers and asks for the latest reports on the Avengers living in the tower. Then, as Phil's walking out for the day, his voice carries in its brisk manner before the agent even makes it to the door.

"_I honestly don't give a damn who you're fucking Agent Coulson. As long as it doesn't affect the team negatively, I don't want to know about it_."

Phil knows even then that it's the only "_congratulations_" he's ever going to get from the man.

* * *

Phil and Tony end up having many issues in their relationship that they systematically work through. It's not easy in the least, but they do it and are better for it. Tony spends too much time in his lab and too little time sleeping. Phil takes too many risks during missions without the protection that the Iron Man suit offers his lover. Though Tony has improved, he's still brash, loud, and irresponsible about the little things (though he's always serious about the important things). Both of them can admit that they have a serious problem showing emotion. At first neither of them are sure a relationship so dysfunctional can work, but they muddle through.

The biggest issue they have, though, is trust. The problem isn't on Phil's side, though people might have been surprised about that. Phil knows that for whatever faults Tony Stark has, the billionaire knows a good thing when he sees it. Tony looks upon himself as lucky most of the time that Phil even sticks around. It's for that reason their relationship will never suffer from infidelity, because Tony is wholeheartedly invested and Phil just isn't that sort of person. No, their trust issues rests almost entirely with Tony and Phil knows the reasons. He's been Tony's handler for much longer than he's been his lover. He knows that the file on Tony's childhood neglect at the hands of Howard and Maria Stark could masquerade as a Victorian novel. He knows that the Ten Rings created fears inside of Tony's psyche that will never soften, never disappear. There are strings of instances, of broken hearts and dreams, in Tony's past that have caused him to close off the deepest part of himself. Phil knows that, knows the reasons, but it doesn't stop him from hurting for Tony's sake.

The biggest issue of trust began with Obadiah Stane. Even months after beginning a relationship with the billionaire, Tony refuses to let him touch the arc reactor on his chest and Phil knows the reason for that too. He's seen the video, seen Obadiah paralyzing Tony in his own home, taking advantage of the fact that Tony loved him like a son would a father, seen him ripping out the one thing that kept Tony's heart beating.

Sometimes Phil wishes that Obadiah Stane was still alive so he could kill him again. He never voices that thought to Tony, not once, but Phil wishes he could torture the man with techniques so horrible they've been forcibly forgotten. He wants to make the man beg for mercy, hurt so bad that he begs for death, and then, when he's on the cusp of blissful sanctuary, Phil wants to rip him away and start the process all over again. That's what he feels every time Tony flinches away from an unexpected touch. That's what he feels when Tony curls into himself at night, arms covering his arc reactor in a way that can only be described as protective. That's what he feels when Tony wakes up gasping for breath, clawing at his chest and neck, muttering frantically about the pain and the taste of a dirty barrel of water in Afghanistan. Phil can only lay there then, attempting to coax Tony out of his own mind, out of whatever nightmare his past has constructed for him.

Phil sees that and realizes _nobody_ has ever been so close to knowing the real Tony Stark, so he's willing to wait until his lover can trust him fully. He realizes that Tony allowing him to see the vulnerable side is a measure of trust as well. Phil can live with that, because he realized a long time ago that he was in it with Tony for the long haul.

It's two years into their relationship before they make the next step. One night before bed Tony allows Phil to stay curled around him, spooning against the genius' back after the sex and soft caresses end. Phil smiles gently and doesn't expect much more, but Tony grabs his hand and places it deliberately on top of the arc reactor. For a moment Phil is still, staring with slight wonder at the back of his lover's head in the dim lighting, but then he begins to press soft kisses against Tony's neck. He uses his other hand to touch every place on Tony he can reach and they have slow, burning sex in the midnight hours. All the while Phil leaves his hand on top of the arc watching the soft glowing blue light dance across the walls, marveling at the shadows cast by his fingers, marveling at what their relationship has developed into. Phil realizes with sudden clarity when they climax for the last time that he's fallen unstoppably, irrevocably, impossibly in love with Tony Stark.

* * *

They don't make the conscious decision to not tell the Avengers about their relationship. Sometimes Tony confides that Bruce might know, but it's nothing conclusive. It's not that they don't trust the other, because both men trust their team with their lives. It's the comfortable feeling of having each other to themselves that stops them in the end. It's not like they are keeping it secret either. There have been plenty of incidents that the Avengers rationalize away, because by nature Phil isn't a very outwardly physical person and Tony Stark has never been good at sharing. So the two men are content in their solitude and the people who do know are content to leave them be.

It's on their fourth anniversary that Phil Coulson proposes to Tony Stark. Tony says yes with wild abandon and proceeds to give Phil the absolute best blow job he's ever had right there on the couch in the communal living room. They are still touching and caressing each other for hours afterwards when they stumble towards the elevator up to the penthouse, narrowly avoiding Clint who's decided on a movie night that they most definitely won't be attending.

The wedding isn't a big thing. They have it at Tony's Malibu mansion, overlooking the beautiful view of the ocean. Fury officiates it. Surprisingly enough, at least 374 contingency plans that S.H.I.E.L.D. has on record requires Nicholas Fury to be an ordained minister in at least 27 states. Tony has a field day with that bit of information until Fury's eye gains a serious twitch and he begins to repeatedly reach for the concealed pistol on his belt. Rhodey stands in as Tony's best man, because there could never be anyone else. He smiles at the two after the ceremony ribbing his best friend about being "settled down". He says it like being settled is a disease, but everybody knows he's happy for them. Pepper cries throughout the ceremony. Happy does too. Phil can't tell whether it's just that they are happy for their friends or if they are relieved that Phil now has the complete responsibility for keeping Tony in check. That's a full time job on its own.

And Phil invites one more person into the group: Natasha Romanov. To say she is surprised that her handler informs her that he is getting married to Iron Man is an understatement. _"I thought you were asexual_." Her tone is flat, but Phil knows she approves, knows why they haven't told the others and why she's the one being told then, because while she might have once written "_Iron Man: Yes. Tony Stark: No." _she's since revised her opinion and counts Tony as one of the few people she trusts with her life. She agrees to be his best woman/maid of honor with a shrug and grumbles about the dress she has to wear, but in the end she smiles and congratulates the two. From the weary looks he catches Tony giving the super spy, Phil also figures that his charge has probably threatened his new husband much the same as Tony's friends did to him.

If he smirks a little at that fact, oh well.

* * *

Fury insists that they take a month for their honeymoon, because, "_You have about three fucking years of vacation days built up and you need to use them before some union comes up the chain of command and starts being a pain in my ass, agent."_ So Tony and Phil make some excuses (actual vacation for Phil and a series of top secret business projects overseas for Tony) and disappear off the grid for a while. They travel mostly, seeing sights, avoiding touristy locations, just basking in the ability to go out anonymously and not have to worry about anything. Tony makes it his mission to have sex in at least six new countries by the end of the month and Phil makes it his mission to make Tony orgasm over every vertical and horizontal surface he can.

They return to New York relaxed and happy. Nobody suspects a thing and Phil really can't get mad at the rest of the Avengers even when he hears that during their time away Clint has managed to punch at least four reporters, Natasha broke a teenager's wrist and both of his legs when he got a little handsy, Thor caused no less than eighteen buildings to collapse, and Steve inadvertently caused a riot through the streets of Brooklyn when he took his shirt off one day during his morning jog.

He never really expected anything less.

* * *

One day, maybe a year later, Tony looks him in the eyes and says, "_I want to fuck Steve Rogers_."

Phil really _should_ be offended by that. He should feel heartsick that his husband wants to sleep with another man. He should be jealous that his husband is looking at another man, but he's not. Phil looks at his husband and is overwhelmed by the images that shoot into his brain like a bullet. He sees Tony in their room, splayed out with wanton abandon upon their bed. His arms are spread above him as Steve hums around his husbands' member, sees himself inching into Steve with clinched teeth as the super soldier groans in ecstasy. He sees Tony pulled up on his hands and knees, sees Steve pounding into the brunette with abandon, sees Steve's head is flung back, lips open wide gasping and moaning obscenities that Phil never imagined Captain America was capable of. There's a bead of sweat that Phil traces from Steve's shoulder, down around a hardened nipple, over a flat stomach, and then towards slightly curved hips that snap back and forth. And Tony would be screaming in his own pleasure if not for the fact that Phil has his cock down the genius' throat literally fucking Tony's face, pinching his nipples while Steve reaches a large hand around slim hips to grasp a weeping erection, pulling and tugging until none of them can take it anymore and their orgasms overcome them.

Phil _should_ be offended, but come _on_. Steve Rogers' chin looks as if it's been carved from marble. His eyes are the most perfect shade of blue and his fucking abs are what even Gods have cause to envy. Phil _should_ be offended, but he's so caught up in the very _thought_ of his husband being fucked by _Captain_ _America_ that he can't even contain himself. He pushes Tony against their living room wall and very nearly dry fucks the man until he's weeping and sobbing, begging for release.

"_So that's a yes?"_ Tony asks afterwards.

"_Yes, I want to watch."_

Tony smirks at him. "_Doll, if I have any say in it, you'll participate."_

And so began the mission of seducing Captain America.

* * *

It was simple at first. Tony predictably showed his interest with obscenely expensive gestures. Rooms full of flowers, movie nights in a newly renovated theatre room featuring films Steve liked, soft touches in the kitchen or hallway, heated glances that left the super soldier's head spinning. Phil watched the proceedings not with jealously, but some odd sort of burgeoning hope curling in his stomach. His husband wasn't ugly by any means, despite pushing forty. Tony Stark still had a roguish charm about him, was fit in his own sinewy way, and had eyes that were dark and exotic. Phil had never been displeased by his looks, or self-conscious about his own, but Steve Rogers was the epitome of genetic perfection. T-shirts and flannels did nothing to hide almost impossibly tight pectorals and his blonde hair always seemed effortlessly styled, not a single strand out of place. Tony confessed that he wanted to run his fingers through it, mess it up, just because he could.

Then it became complicated, because, well, Tony and Phil realized pretty early on that who they wanted wasn't really Captain America, but _Steve Rogers_ and that held far more implications than they'd previously assumed. Captain America was an icon and though a person wore the suit, the idea of Captain America that Phil and Tony had in their heads wasn't _really_ a person, but an idea. Steve, it became clear, was unaccustomed to the sorts of affection that Tony bestowed upon him. Sometimes he seemed uncomfortable with the attention and sometimes he seemed to drink it in with a soft smile. What the couple learned the easiest was that, though they said they wanted the Captain, who they really _needed_ was Steve their friend.

They couldn't start with sex, obviously. Neither Phil nor Tony wanted to freak the super soldier out, but both were unclear on how they should make that known to their teammate. And the entire relationship still had to be kept somewhat a secret. Including Steve in what they had was like taking a leap of faith that he wouldn't tell the others. Tony was especially worried that their affections might be rebuffed entirely.

But then came the day Steve pressed Tony against the kitchen counter and kissed the absolute living daylights out of him and the couple decided maybe Steve was interested after all.

"_Well,"_ Tony had gasped, glancing over at Phil who stood in the doorway with a slightly debauched smirk. "_That was hot."_

Breaking the news of their marriage wasn't all that bad either. The blonde had stared at the two for a good minute before stuttering out a small sigh, but he didn't get up from where they'd sat him down in the penthouse. Steve accepted it with a bit of trepidation, hurt that Tony and Phil felt the need to keep their relationship a secret, but he didn't seem concerned that acting on his feelings for Tony Stark might also begin a relationship with Phil Coulson. To prove his point Steve turned and made out with Phil too, running his fingers lightly down the agents sides, causing the man to shiver just a bit until Tony made a laughing protest somewhere in the background. And that is how the newest affair in Avengers Tower began.

* * *

They moved slowly with Steve. It was impossibly hard to do, but also terribly easy. Sometimes Steve would be a vision of a sex God, but sometimes he would look at them with such a fragile expression that Phil's heart almost broke for the hero. It became clear that the only way to be with Steve was to repeat the process he'd used with Tony: gain his trust slowly.

Fortunately Steve had far fewer trust issues than his husband. They graduated to the bed easily enough, but sex came far later for all of them. Phil and Tony were forced to explore the physical parts of their relationship at odd times, soft brushes of skin during meetings, hot flashes of kisses when they were absolutely sure nobody was looking. It was hard, entirely too hard, but both men wanted to make what they had with Steve work.

Tony dreamed over and over that he was slowly suffocating, a remnant dream of the Ten Rings, Stane, and his adventure flying a nuke into space. Steve dreamt of the ice and the dark, screaming in the nighttime. They both slept cuddled around Phil as if he could provide them with an anchor, or at least catch the bad dreams before they slithered into the superheroes heads.

For a while it was peaceful, something new and refreshing, something exciting for all of them, but also the beginnings of something deeper than they could possibly fathom by rationalizing it. Steve provided the pieces that Tony and Phil didn't even know they were missing and settled into their secret lives with an easy, bashful, abandon.

* * *

The hottest sex Phil Coulson can ever remember having was preceded by the biggest misunderstanding. Two years after Steve Rogers situated himself into the strange relationship between Iron Man and a super spy, long after they had taken the plunge and rid Steve of his virginity, Tony began hinting at fantasies and dreams and an old suit that hadn't been worn since Steve's USO days.

"_What are you asking Tony? Do you even know?"_ At first Steve was offended, afraid that Tony was slipping away from loving him as a person and falling into the admiration of Captain America.

"_What are you talking about Steve? It was just a suggestion_." And then what had been simple desires almost exploded into a situation that threatened not only to end the entire relationship, but destroy Tony in the process. Of course things were said that weren't meant. Of course Tony Stark still had a multitude of issues that Phil sometimes thought could never be worked out. Of course Steve's past and subsequent ignorance of seventy years worth of history intervened. Tony locked himself down in the workshop. Steve steadily worked his way through literally hundreds of punching bags. And Phil for the first time found himself at a loss for what to do about the situation. Natasha couldn't help, though she did manage every so often to get Tony to eat more than DUMMY's nutrient shakes, though it obviously wasn't enough according to JARVIS' scans. None of the other Avengers in the tower even knew about the situation, only that two of their members had fought and it was pretty serious.

After a week of attempting to break Tony out of his lab Phil quietly made his way to the gym and politely explained to the man out of time about childhood fantasies, repressed memories, and sexual kinks that sometimes showed themselves when partners began to trust each other implicitly. All in all, Steve was rather humbled and took the explanation like a champ, thoughtful look upon his face the entire time, though it was clear that he was pretty guilty about the entire thing, because he'd automatically thought the worst of his partners, even if he hadn't known better.

Then Steve volunteered in the scheme to rescue Tony from himself, because in the end, when it mattered, Tony always needed rescuing. He staged all night vigils by the lab doors in hopes that Tony would make a midnight coffee run, but the genius never came out. He watched the skies anxiously during alarms for just a sight of red and gold, but Tony stopped showing up to actual battles, much to Nicholas Fury's consternation, and instead provided backup support by means of strengthened armors and weapons for the team. Eventually the genius stopped letting even Natasha into the labs after the two had a particularly vicious argument that the spy would say nothing about. A month later Phil, Steve, the rest of the Avengers were literally at wits end.

Asking Pepper for advice provided nothing. _"He'll come out when he comes out. I know you're worried, but Tony's feeling a lot right now. He has a lot of things he needs to work out and constantly crowding him won't help the situation."_

Rhodey gave the same sort of advice. "_You can't make Tony Stark do anything. Trust me. He'll have to hit rock bottom before you'll pry him out of this funk."_

And Happy was particularly useless. "_Eh? That's just boss. We all hate when this happens, but he'll get over it. He may have to stay in the hospital a couple days afterwards, but it'll take more than a fight with a team member to take him down." _

Failure wasn't an option, but while Phil Coulson was a master at all situations spy-handler-Avenger related, he was still getting accustomed to the ins and outs of marriage, particularly a marriage to someone as volatile as Anthony Edward Stark. With the added complication of Steve's obvious guilt about the entire situation, Phil found himself rubbing his forehead in exasperation far too often and snapping at the other team members who already knew nothing to begin with. As it was, Tony holed himself down in his lab for two months and it would have been longer had he not collapsed and the Avengers not panicked.

"_Sir, my scanners indicate that as of 4.795 seconds ago Master Stark collapsed in his lab. His body shows signs of obvious organ failure, severe malnutrition, and exhaustion." _

Phil was at the door to the lab in an instant, oblivious to the rest of the Avengers who crowded behind him. His panic was noticeable, but considering that the rest of his team was in the same state, nobody considered it an odd reaction. He was about to begin typing his codes into the system in a desperate attempt to get Tony out, even if they hadn't been working for a while, but Steve pushed him out of the way, slamming a fist into the sliding lab door, leaving a massive fist shaped dint in the middle. Another punch ripped the metal from its track and sent the Avengers flooding into the room Tony had made his prison.

At first all that could be seen was the general chaos that was Tony's lab, organized chaos the billionaire would always say with a smirk. Then it became clear that Tony's bots DUMMY, Butterfingers, and YOU were crowded in the corner around something that obviously turned out to be Phil's nearly comatose husband. It only took a few strides to reach the body and he dimly felt his knees hit the floor as Steve gave a frantic cry in the background. Bruce was switching between checking Tony's pulse and attempting to control his own breathing so he wouldn't Hulk out at the entirely wrong time.

The next few hours passed through in a blur. Tony was loaded into Steve's arms, then into a car, and finally into a hospital where he was admitted immediately into intensive care. Phil couldn't tell you who made it all happen, whether it was himself or Natasha who kept the level head, but he was guessing the female spy deserved most of the gratitude. Seeing Tony laid on the hospital bed made the situation all the more tragic. Steve sat to the side, clutching Tony's hand in a delicate embrace, looking every bit like the devastated lover that he was. Phil was suddenly thankful as he moved forward, running his fingers through his husbands hair and leaning heavily into Steve's shoulder, that Natasha and Pepper had had the foresight to distract the remaining members of the team from intruding on this moment.

"_I didn't mean for this to happen Phil. Oh God."_ Steve's body trembled against Phil's and the spy brought and arm around broad shoulders in an attempt at comfort.

"_It's not your fault Steve. Tony's always had his demons. It was inevitable that we would stir them up at some point."_

But Steve didn't even begin to believe those platitudes. "_Why would he go to such lengths? Why almost kill himself over a stupid argument?" _

Phil sighed. "_Because there was a long line of people before you and I came along who had Tony, but were ungrateful. I know Howard was your friend, but he was the worst sort of father. His mother wasn't any better. After them, all Tony's had in his life were a few close friends and a butler who died when he was a teenager. It wasn't you Steve. It was the reminder of his past that got to Tony. He's had an entire lifetime of people calling him worthless."_ Steve said nothing in response. He only buried his face into Phil's side and allowed his sobs to overcome him. All Phil could do at that point was hold him and wait for Tony to wake up.

* * *

Of course Tony did wake up, not entirely too long after Phil and Steve's moment by his hospital bed. The make-up conversation was stilted and awkward, but the three men worked through it with determination. A month after Tony's collapse the genius was mostly back to full speed and their relationship, while not completely recovered yet, was well on its way to being what it had been before, if a little stronger.

The make-up sex, however, was an entirely different story. Phil had been too worried about his husband those months ago to consider Steve's expression when he'd talked to the super soldier about Tony's hidden kinks. If he tried to remember all he could think of was a distinct impression of being surprised that the man out of time had been more thoughtful than embarrassed about such an explicit conversation. Steve was by no means a virgin. Phil and Tony had seen to that very thoroughly after the initial slow start to their strange threesome arrangement. However, the blonde was still a man born in the forties, unaccustomed to such blatant and open discussion about things of a sexual nature. Sometimes, much to Tony's delight, Steve still blushed like a school girl when the two showed any sort of affection towards him in public, as extremely discreet as they had been at the time. Even Phil had to admit that there was something inherently appealing about the way Steve Rogers stumbled through situations of a mature nature.

So when the man showed up in their bedroom one night decked out in his old USO uniform, Tony and Phil had just stared in open amazement. Okay, so maybe Tony started drooling a little, and maybe Steve had to force himself to not look at the floor in utter humiliation, but any awkwardness disappeared almost instantly, because well . . .

Jesus _Christ_. Steve Rogers looked _amazing_.

Phil couldn't tell you even years later, after the same scenario played itself out in their bedroom dozens of times, how the three of them got their clothes off so quickly. All he knew was one moment he was running all sorts of filthy Captain America fantasies through his head while watching his lover fidget in front of him and then the next moment he was enacting those fantasies with an almost maniacal glee.

"_Oh God! Oh! OH, So good. Steve. Oh! Phil!"_ Tony's voice cried out into Phil's chest as Steve wrapped plump lips around the billionaire's dick, bobbing back and forth eagerly, making obscene sucking noises that had Phil hard in mere seconds. The spy busied himself tweaking Tony's nipples, running fingers gently along the edges of the arc reactore, sucking on a slightly tanned neck, laving his tongue around a rapidly fluttering pulse point, and slicking his fingers in lube, gently pressing against Tony's entrance, watching in smug satisfaction as the brunette fell apart at the seams.

And then Steve Rogers, decked out in his USO uniform, feverishly sucking on Tony's cock, started _humming_. It took Phil all of two seconds to recognize the tune as the USO music played in the videos he'd watched as a child.

And _Holy Fuck_, that was hot. Tony, writhing in his arms, could do nothing but sob in overwhelming pleasure.

Phil realized abruptly as he and Steve maneuvered Tony's body between themselves, that maybe he too had some suppressed sexual desires surrounding Captain America. Man with the plan indeed.

Tony was barely coherent as Phil laid back into the bed, settling his husband above him, chest to chest, entering the genius with one quick thrust. Phil hissed at the pleasure and allowed Tony to adjust momentarily before gripping the man firmly around the hips, lifting him up and then slamming him down, causing both of them to groan. Tony seemed to get the idea fairly quickly because he braced his hands on Phil's shoulders and began to bouncing rapidly in the spy's lap, biting his lips as Phil's member hit his prostate with overwhelming precision. Phil could only spare one glance over the man's shoulder to see Steve almost frantically unbuttoning his pants, palming himself with abandon, eyes almost royal blue with pupils blown out in arousal. The spy groaned as the super soldier made his way onto the bed, bidding the billionaire to pause in his bouncing, but almost screamed along with Tony as he felt another velvety cock join his inside his husband's canal.

The situation was almost too much. Tony was desperate for release. His pleas and prayers blanketed the room, almost drowning out the grunts and groans from his partners as they thrust into him at alternating paces. When one man rushed up into his ass, the other was pulling out creating an almost heart breakingly beautiful friction against his inner walls, constantly applying pressure on his over worked prostate. He felt full, stretched to capacity, laid out so open that it toed the line between pleasure and pain, lost to an oblivion of motions, feelings, and the salty sweet musk of sweat that permeated the bedroom. With a cry he tipped over the edge spraying semen between his and Phil's stomach, his walls clenching so unbearably tight that both Steve and Phil followed him into orgasm.

They laid still, in that same position with Tony sandwiched between Phil and Steve, panting and groaning against the tremors that riddled their bodies for a while, but soon the cum started leaking from Tony's hole, despite the softened members still buried within and the brunette groaned, draping himself over Phil's chest as his partners gently pulled out of him. The slurping sound was lewd. It brought a blush almost immediately to Steve's cheeks and a smirk to Tony's lips as they rearranged themselves onto the bed. Though usually Phil slept in the middle, this time the spy and the blonde curled themselves around Tony who lay almost unresponsive he was so tired.

"_Tony?"_ Steve's voice was soft.

"_Hmm?" _

"_We love you okay?"_ Tony's eyes opened slightly, lethargic as he gripped Steve's hand and pulled it to rest on top of the arc reactor. Phil knew that Steve wasn't ignorant of what Tony's actions implied. He could see the blonde's expression soften even further as the three men settled themselves under the sheets, dropping into sleep almost instantly.

Phil wondered the next day if he imagined Tony's soft whisper.

"_I love you both too."_

* * *

Curiously enough, Steve, Tony, and Phil managed to keep the changes in their relationship a secret more easily than when it was just Phil and Tony. That is to say, Pepper, Rhodey, Happy, and Natasha had absolutely no idea that Phil and Tony's twosome had developed into a threesome some years before the entire situation with Tony locked in his labs for months even occurred.

Again, it wasn't as if they were hiding anything, but the extent that the rest of the team had gone to, to rationalize their obvious affectionate actions and blatant sexual tension was a bit ridiculous. Unlike before, Phil, Tony, and Steve never once sought out any of their friends to tell them of the new dynamics of their relationship. Everyone found out by accident.

About a week after what Tony affectionately and deviously called the absolute best fucking sexual encounter in the universe (Phil and Steve secretly agreed), the billionaire still hadn't stopped walking around whistling a strange cohesive rendition of the USO song and the Mission Impossible tune. Pepper Potts listened to the odd tune for about five minutes before whipping her head up in horror and shrieking, "_Oh my GOD! You are fucking both of them?"_ Phil would have been surprised at her language had he not been looking around the communal living room to see if any of the other Avengers were in the vicinity. He didn't really care if anybody found out, but it _was_ in his best interest as head cat herder to be prepared.

Tony's lips had just stretched into a smirk, confirming Pepper's suspicions. The red head looked between Phil and Tony for a moment, before grabbing her friend by the arm and dragging him out of the room. Phil would have been concerned if he hadn't heard Pepper's words just as the two made it to the door. "_Tony, I know we made a rule that I never wanted to hear of any of your sex-capades, but this time, God, Tony, please tell me __**everything**__."_

Rhodey, who had always been one of Tony's strangest friends had spied the odd closeness amongst Steve, Tony, and Phil for only about a minute before his complexion turned a bit green. Phil could hear him murmuring to himself, "_Don't want to know. Don't want to know. Don't want to know"_ and concluded that Rhodey had "figured it out" so to speak.

Happy found out the same way he did before. It was pretty unfortunate for the driver, as Tony really hadn't meant for him to find out that time, but Happy took it in stride far better than he had when he found out about Phil and Tony. That didn't mean he could look at any of them for about three months without melting into a stuttering mess, but the fact that Steve was equally embarrassed and Tony was pissed that he still had a "_fucking limo that isn't sound proof!? What the hell?"_ served to amuse Phil to no end.

Natasha walked in on them. Plain and simple. They hadn't been clothed. She didn't look away. The entire situation was awkward until the red haired spy gave a slightly impressed nod of appreciation and walked back out of the room. Weeks later Tony began to complain that Pepper and Natasha had created a club devoted to the wet dreams the thought of a spy, Iron Man, and Captain America threesome inspired.

Okay, so, not everybody found out by accident. Phil told Nick. Again, it _was_ a business and Nick _was_ his boss/best friend. Only this time, Phil had made the tactical error of bringing Steve and Tony along for the confession. Before Phil could even open his mouth, Tony had leaned onto Fury's desk with a provocative smirk that Phil and Steve would in no manner claim turned them on. _"I'm fucking your super spy AND your super soldier. How do ya like them apples huh?" _

To his credit, Nick showed no outward signs of surprise. He didn't tense, or frown any more than was default for his face. He merely leaned back and looked at Phil before saying, "_Agent Coulson, if you want to keep a bullet out of your husband's head, you'll get him the hell out of my office."_

Phil decided it was in the best interest of his love and sex life to retreat for the moment, even if he knew that what Fury had actually said was, "_Damn man, what are you a masochist? Also, get the hell out of my office. I don't have time for this shit."_

* * *

When the rest of the team found out it's because, of course, Clint Barton cannot keep his mouth shut to save his life. Okay, well, he _can_, but most of the time he _doesn't_. Also, it's probably Phil's fault in the end anyway, but he doesn't tell Tony or Steve that. He's content to let them blame the archer for this one offense.

Because it was _Phil_ who slammed Tony against the kitchen counter and nearly molested the genius' mouth when Clint decided he needed some orange juice in the middle of the day.

And, admittedly it was _Phil_ giving Steve a blow job at midnight in the communal living room when Clint walked in for a late movie night, dropped his popcorn on the floor, and literally ran away.

And it was _Phil_, tired of Clint's furious glares and misunderstandings, who might have staged for the archer to walk into the gym at just the moment when Steve was thrusting into Tony from behind as Phil was shoving his own cock down his husband's throat. Thankfully, everyone but Tony was mostly clothed (Tony was an exhibitionist at heart), because Steve turned eighteen different shades of red and Tony chocked violently around Phil's cock when Clint started clutching his head and screaming, "_OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!"_ and "_I NEED SOME FUCKING BRAIN BLEACH!" _before running out of the room a whimpering mess. And didn't it suck (well not really, because Tony was no longer in the mood for blow jobs anymore) that the mood was completely broken before Phil was even _remotely_ close to climaxing?

There is an Avengers meeting to sort out all of the details. Clint is twitching the entire time. Bruce sort of looks at them strangely when they get to the marriage part, but just sort of shrugs and drinks his tea. Thor is delighted and almost permanently injures Tony by giving him a bone crushing hug as congratulations on "_the Man of Iron, Son of Coul, and Friend Roger's matrimonial bliss_." Natasha brought popcorn . . .

and inconspicuously filmed the entire thing so she could show Pepper later.

* * *

Years later when Phil lies in bed he thinks about what his life has become. Had anyone asked him at the beginning of his career what he would be doing not even twenty years into the whole spy business, he certainly wouldn't have imagined even mentioning being married to a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist and his honest to God childhood hero, but it was more than that. Lying there in a large comfy bed, he was surrounded with two of the best decisions of his life. It was _Steve_ and _Tony_ that he cherished. A suit of armor and the representation of his hero were just good perks.

When Phil thought of Steve Rogers, he didn't think of Captain America. He didn't think of all the misconceptions he harbored for so long. He didn't think of a man hardened by battle, without issues or problems. He thought of a man who sketched whenever he could, brushing a pencil or a pastel against the rough paper that he preferred, tongue poking out slightly between handsome, kissable lips. He thought of the gentleness of each caress of hands that could easily break the strongest of metals. He thought of soft blue eyes that held wonder for a new futuristic world and sadness for a past left behind, for years that could never be regained. He thought of how Steve's cheeks would light up in a furious blush, but also of his eagerness to please not only his partners, but all of those he deemed his friends.

When he thought of Tony Stark, he didn't think of Iron Man. He didn't think of money, or Stark Industries, or S.H.I.E.L.D. He thought of a man who risked his life not because he had too, not because he wanted the attention, but because he wanted to do something right and honorable. He thought of a man who constantly faced his demons, whether he conquered them or needed to be saved from them. He thought of the false bravado covering up an almost painful streak of self-deprecation. He thought most of all about that day Tony had visited him in New Hampshire, trembling, vulnerable, silently keeping him company, reassuring himself that Phil was _alive_.

Lying there, years later, wrapped up in Tony and Steve's embrace, Phil Coulson was content, more so than he'd ever been.

And as corny as it sounded even to him who was a romantic at heart, Phil was glad that S.H.I.E.L.D had a contingency plan for happily ever after.

* * *

ANNNNNND Finished! I hope you guys liked this. It was sort of difficult to write, because I generally don't do one-shots this long, but I'm happy with how this turned out. As always, if you guys see any problems or typos, please let me know. For some reason, ffnet has been deleting words during the uploading process and I don't always catch that sort of thing before the fic gets posted.

I have a couple other one-shots coming up within this fandom and in others as well. Again, I hope you guys liked it and please review!

Until next time!


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